The 18 Year Gift

 

Having a dog will bless you with the happiest days of your life, and one of the worst.

They say nothing in life is permanent but change. This thanksgiving weekend I had to come to grips with a change that I didn’t want. One that I’ve waited for but would give anything to stop it. To hold onto it a little more before it had to slip away. But that’s life, and in these moments that are more Painful than any explanation, I’m still left with a heart full of joy for the gift and impact that the last 18 years have offered.

Christmas morning year 2000, we ran down the stairs with excitement, opened all of our presents from Santa and after all was said and done, mom said “I have one more!” She comes walking out with a two pound black ball of fur with a big red bow that was bigger than he was. We named him Maxamillion, and that day I found my best friend for the next 18 years and a memory that would carry on a lifetime. He was by far, the best Christmas present ever.

Today at almost 30 years old with tears streaming down my face,  I held Max in my arms as he took his last breath the same way I held Max in my arms the day he breathed his first with us, and I said goodbye to my best friend. While driving to bury him on our family land where I once ran as a child,  I asked myself the question: “What was so special about Max to you? What role did he play in some of the most influential years of your life?” And it was just that, he was my best friend. From a young child, throughout my adolescent and teenage years up through early adulthood. He was always there. When I felt like no one else was, it was him. As a child when I felt so alone, Max was molded to the side of my leg or right at my heels and wouldn’t let go. He licked the tears away and He gave kisses on command. Every single day when I would be minutes out from coming home from school, he would sit patiently by the door waiting for me. How he knew? That’s the special intuition that only an animal knows. We will never understand the capabilities and deepness in the bond that we as humans have with our furry friends. Days when I was sick and when I was hurting, he always knew. He followed me everywhere and never left my side. I found at a young age, that when I was hurting the most, there are things that you can get from the silent devoted companionship that you can get from no other source.

Today as we made the decision that it was time, I honestly didn’t know if I could handle it. The thought of walking into the vets office with him made my eyes well up with tears. I’ve always said goodbye every time I’ve left home the past couple of years but never fully comprehended what it would truly feel like. Max never left my side, even on the darkest days, and I couldn’t leave his. The last 2 days I have spent cherishing every last moment that I knew I had with him. I’ve held him closer than I ever have. Last night, as our last, I pulled him close to my side as it was just him and I. I laid my head on his and I told him how much I loved him. I thanked him for being there and for being my best friend when I wasn’t always a best friend back. I apologized for days when other things came before him. Even For moving Away. I wanted him to know that I never gave up on him. And lastly I told him that he was my one. That I don’t know the caliber of woman that I would be today without his agape love, sacrifice, and selflessness the last 18 years. It’s funny how much of an impact that something who can’t speak can have on one person, isn’t it?

I consider it a pure blessing to be able to be home and to hold him tight to my heart as he took his last breath. A Black Friday will never be the same. But I do know there will never be another Black Friday that I won’t look up and thank God for 18 precious years of this gift. Hold your dogs tighter and love them everyday. You are all they have and they live for you day in and day out. You never know when you will have to hold them for their last breath. It’s not and If, it’s a when. Cherish every second.

Years ago I found an excerpt that said God couldn’t physically be with us so he gave us dogs with a simple explanation that Dog spelled backwards is God. God said, “I need somebody strong enough to pull sleds and find bombs, yet gentle enough to love babies and lead the blind. Somebody who will spend all day on a couch with a resting head and supportive eyes to lift the spirits of a broken heart.” So God made a dog. They love unconditionally like he does, they are selfless, they are the prime example of agape love. Even on days when we push them away, they pull us even closer and hold us even tighter. They don’t judge us for the bad that we do, it’s unconditional. Maxamillion was my little piece of God here on earth and I am forever grateful. Rest In Peace my sweet friend. I will see you over rainbow bridge one day soon.

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The McLeod's

Welcome to our blog! We’re glad you stopped by and we hope you come back and visit. We want you to be a part of our journey! We are John and Chelsea McLeod. Best friends who are embracing the most precious gift of marriage and life. On the way to be full time missionaries and currently living a life mentoring those broken by addiction from both sides of the pain- loved ones and those struggling with addiction. Here you will find our recorded histories of life, love, struggles, and the journeys that encompass our wanderlust spirits all with an unfailing love for God and His ever so perfect redemption and grace over our lives. Here lies a safe place where our minds wander off into the deepest places with documentation to never be erased. We don’t want our memories to fall between the cracks somewhere, so we write. We don’t want to forget how far God has brought us, so we make records that will prayerfully live on for generations and give others hope who have lost theirs. We met in the most divine of appointments thousands of miles apart that only God could orchestrate. Had our first date watching a fiery sunset go down over the Georgia coast, and ultimately fell in love over kindred spirits that beat for where and what God passionately filled our hearts with. Hindsight, and years later, we can see that God had big plans all along that we couldn’t see. Through our broken pasts, He was preparing us for each other and a future of redemption and testimony. {{{{Everyone has a story and this is ours:}}}}} He’s a Georgia boy, she’s a Carolina girl. ----Hi, I’m Chelsea!---- I’m a native Carolina girl who loves to explore anywhere I’ve never been. An old soul and an extroverted-introvert with a deep heart that overflows with passion and a hunger for God to use me to change this world for the better. Mysterious and meek to the eye, and particularly passionate for the very things that set my heart on fire, especially the things and people that my heart beats for. I get filled up in the untouched outdoors where I can always see and feel His splendor. I am a Master cosmetologist by trade with a BA in Social Work and Counseling. These which intermix daily. I absolutely love the career that God has placed me in and daily, it allows me to love on people all around me. If I can make one person smile a day, my heart holds a fullness that keeps me coming back for more. I believe in forgiveness and miracles because I’ve witnessed them both. I don’t want my life to be about what I accomplished but what God accomplished through me. To me, I’ve learned that in life there is good and bad, right and wrong, excuses and no excuses. But alongside of these very things is engulfed with a ton of grace, growth, and redemption. I don’t ever want to pay the cost of not following my heart, by spending the rest of my life wishing I had. ----Hi, I’m John!---- I’m a born and bred Georgia boy where my blood runs strong with salt water. I was born and raised on the coast where everything I did was engulfed with water and the outdoors. I’m a bold soul with a gentle spirit who loves to help others in any way that I can to believe in themselves and God’s plan over their lives. By trade I hold the title of professional hunter and fisher with a 100 ton captain’s license. What started in Georgia took me out to Alaska where I found my career there, then south Florida and the open blue water. I’ve seen a lot and experienced a lot of God’s beauty and I will be forever grateful for that. Today I’ve taken on the title of “Fisher of men.” After enduring a wearisome season of addiction, God called me to use my pain to help others in addiction ministry and it has become one of the greatest joys of my life. It’s what I live for in showing people they can overcome something that most think they can’t. Offering hope where there is none. Testifying that something they always thought they would be, is only a season that God is ready and wants to use. Where Chelsea serves alongside me pouring into the loved ones. It’s where my passion is, it’s where we love to help others find freedom the same way we did. Today, Chelsea and I are grateful for our struggles because we know that what the enemy meant for evil, God used for good. Here we will write and share. Not to glorify us, but to glorify Him and what He is doing in our lives. The magnificent ways that He is moving and the unfathomable circumstances that He has and will bless us with. All glory goes to Him. We hope you enjoy!!

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